By PRIA WARRICK, etiquette coach and clinical psychologist

Post Your Queries For Relationship Expert

    • Team NIE
    • Publish Date: Apr 19 2017 1:19PM
    • |
    • Updated Date: Apr 24 2017 11:48AM
Post Your Queries For Relationship Expert

Relationships, not just those that have cupids and hearts but each one of them, are complicated, and there are times when you need help to sort out the issues you are facing. TOI Student has brought on board experts who are a pro at eliminating relationship hiccups. Just post your questions in the comments section and we will get them answered. It could be about a friend not talking to you, being friendzoned, problems with parents or sibling. Just bring them on! 
 
 
Q. My best friend is talking behind my back. She is letting out my secrets and also spreading negative things about me. This has led to a loss of face for me in my class. How do I control the damage done? Also, how do I confront my friend?
A. Dear friend in need, there is tremendous peer pressure these days that leads to insecurity and back biting in young people. People talk behind your back because of their own insecurity and also to find acceptance in other groups. Here is what you can do to deal correctly with the situation.  
  • Select friends for the right reasons, not to “just have some friend”. Understand that it’s all right to be alone sometimes, which has become difficult these days because there is too much pressure on moving together.
  • Talk to the group who has been privy to your so-called best friend’s negative talk. Walk up to them and say confidently that you are fond of them and what they have been hearing about you are false rumours. Make this point and move away; don’t wait for acceptance. 
  • About confronting your friend, there are two options. First, ignore her and move on. Second, you confront her directly. Do this in front of the group to whom she has been talking about you. This will catch her off guard and she will not have a credible counter argument. And you will come out clean from this mess. 

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Comments

Emima Thangapandi PADUA HIGH SCHOOL-MANKHURD

I had a best friend with whom I was able to share all my problems, but my parents don''t accept his friendship with me just because he was a boy.Now when I have problems like when I am in depression I always remember him and feel that my parents never understand me.How can I tell this to my parents?

Emima Thangapandi PADUA HIGH SCHOOL-MANKHURD

I feel unsecured when my parents fight I am not able to share my problems with them.I just sit alone and cry. How can I deal this?

Aikya Oruganti Epistemo Global - Vikas Leadership School

I have a childhood friend who is being pulled by my enemy. What to do ?

Shubham Bansal AMITY SCHOOL (GURGAON SEC_46)

nice initiative...

ayushi AKSIPS 45,Smart School

a friend of mine is badly into flaunting and belive out of that probably 90% is LIE! i dont want to ignore her nor i want to live with her and listen to her lies! what to do???

VANSH AGGARWAL AMITY SCHOOL (GURGAON SEC_46)

Yeah... this article will be very useful to students who are facing problems about relationships and all.....

Damini Shrivastava PADUA HIGH SCHOOL-MANKHURD

I had a friend on whom i had blind trust but just because of some problems they left me....💧😢

Hemalatha.G Sethu Bhaskara Matriculation Higher Secondary Scho

My best friend who studied with me in 5th and 8th is again back. But now her another friend is also with het. So she not so close to me now as she was before. But she is not doing it wantedly.😢😢😢😢😢

Hemalatha.G Sethu Bhaskara Matriculation Higher Secondary Scho

At times my elder sister is harsh to me, which hurts me a lot

Aadrit Banerjee Apeejay School Salt Lake

I am good in studies. And because of this my friends and their family envy me a lot. This has reached an extreme level and they are now spreading rumours about me. What to do? Please help as this problem is really troubling me...

Asmita D.A.V Public School, Thane

I have a friend, who occasionally ignores me and is sometimes mean. Though, sometimes, he is very helpful. Why does this happen?

Asmita D.A.V Public School, Thane

Sometimes I don''t even know whether I have friends. I feel like I am always in a one sided friendship with everyone I consider my friends. How can I make sure that someone is really my friend?

Abhinav Poludasu Meridian School Kukatpally

Yeah actually have the same prob... Some people just make snide comments on me and frankly speaking, I just HATE it.... There is my friend who makes comments as a "Overgrown 1st grade child" and that seriously just springs me up...

Mythili Iyer Greenwood High

I have best friend who I am very close to, and has started calling me names, and she is starting to annoy me very much. But I can''t leave her because we have planned some things together. Please advise.

Neha Varadharajan The Orbis School

I totally agree. I have had several questions about the friends I make . I am choosy in the type of friends I make. I have had several painful experiences in my life, about friendship. There was a girl who proved to be a quality friend, yet tried to push my spirits down just because I was academically better than her, and she shifted to Malaysia a year ago. I learnt a valuable lesson from this- Make no friend not equal to yourself.

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